how my shot ruined my body

When I was 17 and heard I was going to need to do a shot everyday for the rest of my life (unless trying to get pregnant, pregnant or nursing), they never told me all of the side effects. Sure they told me it would hurt, but not too much. They even told me I needed to rotate to seven different areas because it takes that long for the injection site to heal from the shot.

The big thing they didn't tell me what about atrophy. I was really good about sticking to my injection site and even have proof to show someone if they wish to see it... Yet, on all seven injection areas I have atrophy. I first started noticing it about 2 years after I started, and now I have to call either my sister-in-law (who's a nurse) or one of my sisters (she has RA and has to do shots too) to find a good place to do my shot (that won't make the atrophy any worse than it already is.)


Where are these sites? Both arms, both hips, both thighs, and below by belly button. So now, if you go and look at some of the pictures on my other blog about all the clothes I have, you'll see that it looks like I'm having some muffin top issues going on. I wish I was, because then there would be a way to fix it. That's actually where you can see some of what's going on.


Yes, I know there are commercials for pills for the type of MS that I have and I've been begging my doctor to put me on one. He then starts listing off why it's not the best fit for me, like the whole having to stay in a hospital for 48 hours under observation (I have two small boys and live about an hour and a half from my neurologists office), messes with the heart (both my grandpa's had heart problems), messes with the lungs (had a virus when I was 2 that made those not so wonderful), and he doesn't think there has been enough research on them.

Now, there are 3 other kinds of shots I could do (that you only have to do once a week), but their major side effect is depression. And since I haven't had a full blown attack from my MS for so long and I'm not depressed, my doctor would rather keep me on the same thing I've been once for more than 10 years.

Keeps me modest though. I don't wear short shorts, bikini's, tank tops without a shirt over them and no short shirts showing my belly. But since I'm a mother of two boys and my husband likes my t-shirts, I don't really feel the need to be all that girly anyways.

Gym time

My legs were feeling a bit strange, so I got up and went to the gym. What does that have to do with MS? The weather. It's supposed to snow tonight and tomorrow. Extreme temperature changes and I really don't get along.

Of course, it didn't help very much that after 6 machines, my left knee started hurting and I had to give up and just finish up on the bike for the night. I'm known pretty well for pushing myself too far, and even more so when I'm sick, told I can't or something hurts.

Since there's another doctor appointment that I have to take my boys to, I decided not to push myself too far and go at least somewhat easy on myself for the night. I'll still do my usual cool down, but I don't think I need to post pictures of that again.

stupid jet stream

So, the jet stream has made it so that it's still staying somewhat cold around here. In return, my MS has seen fit to make my wrist hurt so much that I spent my whole day only holding hands with my kids and making my husband change diapers, lift the kids, dress the kids and put them in their car seats. Now, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, except it really does make me feel like a bad/lazy mother and that also stresses me out a wee bit. So to make sure that things don't get out of hand, I may head out to the gym once both boys are asleep. I will probably add another post with pictures of my work out if I do go.

I may have done too much

Last night I went to the gym and really only intended to work out for around maybe an hour and a half. When I went up to the front desk to start my "cool down" (I'll post pictures of what that is), the lady at the desk said i deserved it for working out so long. Looked at my phone and it had been two and a half hours! I was a little shocked, but even more so that I didn't start feeling what all I had done to my muscles until tonight. They're telling me to take the night off and just get some sleep, but if I can't get to sleep I will be going back to the gym tonight. Tomorrow should be a fun day with how sore my muscles are starting to feel now. Maybe now I'll take up yoga or something. Probably not though. My "cool down" consists of a massage chair for 6 minutes, a hydro massage bed for 6 minutes and then a tanning bed for 5 minutes (mostly because I get to lay down and its warm in that bed). I honestly can't tan (even with cheating with a tanning bed) so it really is just to relax a little while longer before showering and driving home.

Finally back at the gym

I was told early on, after being diagnosed with MS, that stress will only make things worse for me. So I took that to heart. Then I was told I couldn't do anymore high impact sports. That included basketball (that I had played since I was 10 and loved it), volleyball, running, and pretty much every sport I played. Then, I was told that working out was really good for keeping my MS pretty quiet. So when I started college and took weight training, I found a way to deal with my stress and MS.

That's what I still do. It also helps with getting me back in shape to do the Bike MS with my brother. So, here's a look on pictures of what I do at the gym. Or, at least, what I did tonight. I'll post sets, reps and weight if anyone asks. And what all I did with the free weights.

A few days later

The lighting in my bathroom isn't great so the colors are off, but I can promise you that really is a bruise.

you mean thing

     Something that MS is really good at doing is screwing me over. For the past few weeks, I've felt like I had a sinus infection or allergies. So I brushed it off as just that and nothing to really complain about. Then cold things started to hurt. That's when I started thinking that maybe I should break down and take my temp. And there it was, 102.9... I was mad. I had already made plans for that night and they were done for.

Then, last night I finally broke down and sent a text to my sister-in-law that is a nurse, for tips on how to get rid of this fever that has had me house bound for 2 days. I did what she said and thought that, since I was feeling better today and had already been stuck inside for 2 and a half days, it would be alright for me to go out with my boys.

We did. We went to the mall, the Dollar Tree (LOVE that place) and out for dinner. Then, we get home, put the boys in bed and I stupidly thought, "Maybe I'll see how low my temp is now..." Should have just left it on the counter. My fever was still there, not has high, but still there. I had to make phone calls to reorganize things for tomorrow, that I'm going to miss, and it throws off my plan of going to the gym to get this stupid cold out of me. My coughing and sniffling is giving me a headache and I just want to curl up in bed next to the husband and not go anywhere.

       So what does MS have to do with any of this? EVERYTHING. MS (for me anyways) has always taken some harmless little illness I may have and blow it up into this huge thing that keeps me down. I'm really not one for being force to stay down at all, ask my husband or parents sometime... Ask them about my spinal tap, mono, having baby #1, being pregnant with either of the boys, or anytime I've been sick. I just don't like to stay still for very long.

       After I had baby #1, I noticed that anytime the temperature (yes I can spell that word and don't always use temp) my wrist would start hurting. They didn't just have an ache to them, they hurt so bad I had a hard time picking up my new born baby. Which was kind of bad because, of course, this didn't start being a problem until after I let my husband go back to work (I'm a needy wife.)

So, of course, now that I'm sick and even have a fever, what happens? My right wrist is killing me! It started on Wednesday, but I didn't think much of it because I saw that it was supposed to snow, but now that it's supposed to snow, yet again, (after a couple nice days in the 60's) my wrist is killing me even more. I asked my neurologist about it a few months after I first noticed it. He started to brush it off and blame my cell phone for it. Then, I told him that it only seems to happen when the temperature changes. That's when he acted as if I had said that magic word. He nodded and said, "that sounds more like it's MS related."

      Well, thanks for reading my rant. I will now get off my soap box and go do my shot. I'll post a picture of the shot I did on my leg a few nights ago. I forgot that they sometimes bruise.